Monthly Archives: November 2010

Hoarders, Sneezing and Appearances

As you can likely tell from the title here, this post is going to be a hodge-podge.  I can’t believe anyone is even still looking here to find anything to read anymore, I’ve neglected so long. I’ll continue to pop back in and write as I have the urge. I do promise, though, however random this post is, it will end with an adoption focus at the end.


My friend in Florida and her family have a business in which they haul away junk. They were recently on an episode of “Hoarders.”  Fun to watch them, but oh so sad to see the families on that show sufferining because of the illness that pushes folks to hold on to every little thing.  So, so sad.  However, as I sat in my office last week on one of a million days I’ve done the same, I started feeling overwhelmed by my own tendency to hang on to EVERYTHING.  My office is a mini-hoarders episode.  I have a decent sized office as far as not for profit space goes.  No window, but I’d say I have a space around 10×14.  That should be plenty of room for everything I need to do my job, multifaceted as it is.  But it has become full.  As in file cabinets full, drawers full, tables stacked, shelves packed, desk invisible for the varius piles of papers, books, notebooks, kleenex boxes, envelopes and folders on top of it.  So this week, I said “ENOUGH,” and have been whittling piles, throwing things away, filing, shredding, and rearranging.  I’m coming in to the office on Saturday, and will be making BIG CHANGES, people!  I can’t live like this any more.  I feel the need to be more efficient, rely on sticky notes less, and find a way to use a whole yellow pad of paper before going on to the next one (I have uncovered approximately 239479348737 half used pads in my endeavor so far!).


Aside from sneezing from the dust I’m stirring up at my desk, I’ve been sneezing and snorking, coughing and hacking for the past week.  I can’t get rid of this headcold/sinus infection thingy.  Its wearing me out.


I took Woob to preschool yesterday, and sent him directly in to wash his hands in the bathroom.  Usually that means I see him 3 seconds later with barely damp hands, and have to send him back in to do it right.  This time, he was in there a really long time.  I waiting a little extra, and finally went in after him.  He hadn’t washed his hands yet, but I found him standing in front of the sink, looking at his reflection in the mirror. 

  “Mom?  Why do I look like this?”    I was a bit taken aback.  I don’t think he’d ever initiated a discussion on his appearance before, and I can’t recall him ever really LOOKING at himself other than to make sure the toothpaste was off face or to see if a sucker had turned his tongue blue.  And, of course, this question could be asked at lots of different levels and mean different things…so I tried to hit them all at once.

While he washed his hands I did my best:  “Well, your face looks the way it does because it looks a lot like your Mama N.’s and Granpa G’s.  You have eyes and mouth shaped like N. and a little dimple in your chin like G.  You have a smile on your face right now because you’re a happy little boy.  I love that smile!  And you have this crazy bedhead because of the way you layed on it last night and we didn’t do a great job combing it this morning.  And that’s why you look like that.”

I don’t know which point it was he was looking for but he smiled, dried his hands and said “Okay!” as he darted out of the room.  Who knows what he was thinking as he looked at himself in the mirror.  But I’m glad he asked, as it gave us one more opportunity to talk about his family connections in a positive way.



Filed under adoptee, adoption, growing up, open adoption