Baby’s Back ‘On’

In case you didn’t catch my addendum to the post Friday, they sent N. back home after originally telling her she’d be having her baby that day.  She was bummed and ready to meet her new little girl.  I got an email tonight that she’ll be induced first thing tomorrow morning.  She sounded excited and she’s got an air of hope about her.  She’ll be great, I’m sure.  The funny thing about it all is that originally we were planning to go this weekend for a visit before the baby was born (her due date isn’t for a week and a half).  Obviously, knowing the baby was coming sometime this week, we decided to lay low and hold off on a visit and assumed that was just a given.  Apparently not.  She’s still thinking at the time of her email that we’ll be coming up.  There’s gonna be so much going on and she, in my opinion, needs this time with her family and friends to celebrate the birth of her little girl.  Yes, we are her friends and Woob is her family, but…

I’m really afraid that our presence so near the time of her delivery could really trigger some heavy stuff with her.  I mean, the last time we saw her in a hospital, she had just given birth to Woob.  She was crying as she left and as we were comforting the baby after his circumcision.  It wasn’t a time that felt good for ANY of us.  How could it be okay to be there at this point??

On the other hand, I am a class A worrier, and awfulize everything, usually unnecessarily.  That and, I’m not her mother.  She already has one of those.  So who am I to impose what I think she will or won’t be feeling or thinking.  Heck, with some of the turmoil that goes on in her life and family, maybe we’re some of the most stable people around for her and she needs us there.  I just don’t know how to judge it.

I don’t think we’ll come this weekend, that’s for sure.  Next weekend at the VERY earliest, but, gah…I just remember how TIRED I was one week, two weeks, a month into the sleep deprivation.  Of course, I’m old compared to her youth, so that’s no way to gage it either, I suppose.

I don’t know…

I’m just happy Little Sis is coming, I know N. is looking forward to meeting her and so are we. 

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8 Comments

Filed under adoption, birthdays, birthparents, grief, open adoption

8 responses to “Baby’s Back ‘On’

  1. Wow, coming so soon! It will be great to meet little sis!

    And you’ll do great. Remember, you know your stuff, you have got a healthy perspective, I know you’ll do great.

    Hang in there and give N a hug from us!

    Jamie

  2. My guess is she wants you there because she considers you guys family and you are supporting her. I get how totally *weird* it could be–but this time around she’ll be focused on Baby Girl, and you’ll be visitors, not potential parents….I agree with Jamie, you guys will do great.

  3. thanksgivingmom

    I think Baby is coming now, yes?? Sending prayers and thoughts out to Mama and Baby!!

    You’re always so thoughtful and considerate, I know that you will be great in whatever capacity you end up being involved over the next few weeks!

  4. Bless her heart, N. finally had the baby around 4:30 this morning after being induced YESTERDAY at 7:30 a.m.

    Reports are that she’s beautiful and TINY (3 lbs, 2oz littler than the Woob was at birth) and best of all healthy. Mama and Daddy are tired but excited. I sent flowers and a teddy bear and a promise that we’ll come see them in a month or so.

  5. storkwatcher

    Oooh – long labor. BUT YAYA! WOW. Yes, she IS tiny. I’m SO glad you sent them the gifts, and I think I would have done the same as you -waited for the visit (but I hate to visit ANYONE other than my sisters when they give birth – what a chaotic time in the hospital!)

    You’ll be able to ooh and aah as 2 moms over her very soon. And I can’t wait to hear Woob’s reaction to her!

    All our family babies were at least 4 pounds, so I bet 3 seems minute!

    Best of luck to them! Congrats, Woobie, on being a big brother!

  6. Oh, Stork, just to clarify–Baby J is not 3 lbs, but 3 lbs littler than Woob was. Babe is over 5 lbs, but that seems sooooo tiny in comparison. Woob was a hoss!

  7. thanksgivingmom

    Phew, glad to hear that Baby J is over 5 lbs! I too read that the baby was just over 3 lbs!!

  8. younevergetoverit

    Yay! Glad to hear good news!
    How considerate of you to send gifts. I can only imagine how much those flowers meant to her.

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